“Lean into your humanity.” I received this guidance four years ago at a coaching seminar I attended. Honestly, I had no idea what it meant or how to do something I didn’t understand, but I trusted my coaches saw something I couldn’t.

What is humanity? Aren’t I already human? How do I lean into being human? Why would this benefit me?

Four years later, I have figured it out and am now saying the same thing to my clients. Lean into your humanity. There is magic to be unlocked there.

So, what is humanity? It makes us all human- compassion, empathy, feeling your feelings, understanding how others might feel, and being open to all the facets of life. Most of all, you need a good dose of honesty and an open heart.

Sounds simple enough, right?

If you are anything like my people or me, we resist what makes us human because life is often easier when we are more like steel than a big bleeding heart. When we resist feeling vulnerable, scared, worried, disappointed, upset, or anything “worse” than neutral, we experience it as a weakness and unshareable, almost like a blemish.

To see my humanity, I had to be honest with myself. First, I had to admit to myself all the places I felt vulnerable or less than perfect. It started by looking at the areas of life I wanted to keep private. For me, it was anything I thought was a weakness. I resisted sharing my fears, and I resisted sharing my struggles. It wasn’t until I could finally admit that my struggles did not make me weak; they made me HUMAN, which was actually an asset, not a weakness, that I started honoring all my experiences.

What unfolded over time was more connection with the people in my life. I had more patience for a variety of situations. My life also got a lot easier because I was no longer putting on a front that everything was fine. It turns out that no one’s life is fine all the time. When I shared the ups and downs of life with my community, I created more relationships with less lying, pretending, or avoiding.

Leaning into my humanity allowed me to be with others’ humanity more easily. I have fewer grudges. I am less offended. I am more compassionate. I am way more truthful. Most of all, I feel a lot more, which I used to run away from. When I feel more, I can be a better friend to others. I am a better coach, wife, and mom because I have more to pull from and empathize with.

It might have taken me four years to work through this one, but it was some of the most incredible coaching support I have gotten. Lean into your humanity. Hopefully, in less than four years, you, too, will experience liberation on the other side <3